I was on a call the other day with a beautiful woman who has decided to reach for the stars. It really excites me when I hear a vision like this.
The thing is her fear of failure was leading her to choose to get in her own way. And I say choose, because it is a choice even though it doesn’t feel like it at times.
She was procrastinating and distracting herself. And she was making choices that take her away from her goal not closer to it.
Whether we fear failure or fear success it all boils down to the same thing. The possibility of vulnerability will be increased and that means we can feel bare and unprotected.
The thing is, the fear isn’t created by what is happening right now or even what might happen in the future. It is created by something that happened in your life many years ago and because of that you made a choice to change your perception of yourself and the world. This affects the actions you choose to take or not.
When you create a different perception then the way you feel about the current or future situation will change. This means you get out of your own way and take the actions that will help you achieve what you want.
Be your own devils advocate
There are so many different ways of looking at something and yet because of our default we tend to get fixated on one. Having the awareness to be your own devils advocate is powerful. If you are telling yourself “I might fail if I do this”, then challenge that with “How would I be failing if I don’t?”.
Often we hold ourselves back because we future pace a disaster and our unconscious mind, where all our limiting beliefs and patterns are held, tells us we wouldn’t be able to cope. Not achieving your goal or not excelling at something is a setback it’s not a catastrophy. Ask yourself “What’s the worst thing that can happen?” and you can bet your bottom dollar its something you can handle.
Look for examples of you handling the worst
Through our lives there have been many times we have handled challenges. It’s not something that we particularly want, but it is something we do handle. And if we can handle those unforeseen challenges it means we can handle a challenge we choose. Look for examples in your past of you handling something you thought you wouldn’t be able to get through. The strength and courage you embraced in that moment will serve you through this.
Always remember, the feeling is caused by your perception and your perception is caused by the way your mind is set. If you are still feeling resistance after following the above three steps, then it means you need to work on the core issue that is behind the fear and this requires deeper work. Reach out and speak to a coach.
I am holding a workshop in Cairns, Australia next month. FINISH STRONG 2018 – How to get out of your own way, achieve high and finish the year strong – will be held on Friday 14 September, 9am – 11am. If you are ready to get out of your own way, achieve high and finish the year strong, then CLICK HERE for more details and to book.