Do you have friends or know people who seem to always be happy and nothing seems to go wrong for them?

Or you may have acquaintances or have connections on social media who often talk about their achievements or seem to have a great life.

I know how you feel, because I see those people too. I also hear comments from my friends about how I always seem to be happy and I’ve also been told before that I’m envied because of my life and how things seem to be going great for me.

Well, you know what, its just a perception!

No one has a perfect life and no one sails through life without any problems. The difference between people who seem to have a lot of problems and people that seem to have none is that they just know how to flow though and work with life in a really effective way.

Having a great life isn’t about never having problems, because that can never exist. Life is always about growing and learning and if we never experience challenge, then we will never grow.

Think about a seed sprouting and growing into a large magnificent tree. When its pushing through that dirt to sprout into the magnificent tree it is meant to be, it’s a huge challenge, but if it didn’t do that then it would never grow.

I have to say I do have a great life and things do often go really well for me. I feel happy for most of the time, but it isn’t always that way.

There are a lot of challenges on that journey and as my life gets better and better the challenges actually become greater not smaller. The difference is in me, its internal! I have learned how to manage myself and manage my mind and because of that I’ve become who I need to be to handle even greater challenges.

And, it’s always an ever-developing journey!

Those people who seem to have a great life, still have times when they fall in a heap, me included. We still have times when we get overwhelmed, when we end up in a flood of tears, we get angry, frustrated, we still feel scared at times and sometimes anxious when we have a lot at stake. We still put in massive amounts of effort, money and time to get results that are not that great at times and things sometimes don’t go to plan.

But, what’s different is we have is conscious awareness!

That may seem small but in fact is your greatest asset. Because, with conscious awareness you can take full responsibility for your response and then change it so it works for you instead of against you.

How do we do it?

We acknowledge all emotions and don’t see them as good or bad. This is never about ignoring any emotions or pretending they don’t exist, because that’s like trying to stop a 2 year old opening the kitchen door, the more you try to stop them the harder they push. The more we try to bury emotions the more they persist. We acknowledge our emotions, allowing ourselves to feel them. we listen to what they are trying to tell us, the lessons to learn. Emotions are a great indicator of our thoughts. We ask ourselves, what am I telling myself that is leading me to feel this?

We change our thoughts and the stories we tell ourselves. We are constantly curious and aware of how we think. No matter what we are feeling it is simply a result of our thoughts and what we are focusing on. And truly, this is not about forcing positive thinking; it’s about optimistic thinking. Optimistic thinking is about changing our thoughts and focus so it supports what we want, and at the same time making a decision to do something about it, taking a different action or making different choices.

We ask ourselves quality questions. This keeps us in a place of empowerment. We are aware of when we are asking ourselves questions that are keeping us stuck, or questions that make us feel down on ourselves. And, this isn’t about perfection and always getting it right. We make mistakes and ask ourselves questions that can bring us down. The difference is we have conscious awareness, we know when we are doing it. We have a list of questions that we know really work in keeping us well above the line and at cause for the kind of experiences we want.

We look after ourselves always. We have full understanding that all change begins with us and if we aren’t looking after ourselves then we are going to find it pretty hard going. And this is about more than just going for a manicure, or a run every so often. Its about looking after our whole selves, it’s about self-care everyday. Even when life gets chaotic we still do this, when we have parents in hospital, problems with children, challenges in our business, when we are feeling under the weather, we still do this. Self-care for us is like breathing oxygen, we know it’s vital and we make a commitment to it every single day.

We look for the good in life. We actively look for the good in life and practice appreciation every day. We acknowledge ourselves for what we did well and the great things that happened during the day instead of totally focusing on what we didn’t do well or the not so great things that happened during our day. This takes regular practice and the more we practice the more great days and happiness we experience.

These are just a few ways we stay consciously aware, so we experience life at its best and seem to others to have no problems. There are many more.

Experiencing your best life and your happiness all begins with you, it’s an internal thing! When you acknowledge that and start to work with it, you will notice your life begin to change and that’s because you will see through the same lens too.